13 It rains every morning

Before the cancer I was the picture of health. No history, I didnt take any medications other than a multivitamin and I didnt need glasses. What once was a pretty empty bathroom counter is now littered with prescription pill bottles and over the counter meds, not 1 but 2 toothpastes, queasy drops, tongue scraper, you get my point. All part of my routine which has changed. I used to shoot out of bed and be ready to roll.I also used to require some sort of background noise before I could fall asleep. Now every morning it rains.

0600 I wake up, sip some water, clear the mucus and take 3 pills. I need to wait for about an hour for them to kick in until I feel well enough to take the next round. I found a 10 hour rain storm on youtube and that is a requirement now. Any silence needs to be filled with this rain and I cant explain it. Its calming and it reminds me, that I can weather this storm. Morning, noon or night, if im awake and dont feel well this rain fills my ears and it helps.

0700 more pills and some breakfast, if you can. 0930 I should feel well enough to get moving for a bit. Noon, back to the couch, fatigued, tired. Nap. Dinner. Bed.